My Fictitious Christmas Letter
Dear Family,
You may recall that Eddie and I have been married for over 8 years now. You may also remember that I did not change my name when I got married. I realize that in your busy lives this is a trivial matter, but I would think that those of you who made a scene about it at my wedding rehearsal in front of the priest would still recollect that precious moment. For those of you not at the wedding, perhaps you may have noticed our separate names on all of the checks, birthday cards, Christmas cards, and other correspondence we've sent over the years.
Trust me, I understand how you are all busy with your own lives and this minor point may have slipped your attention. However, I also know that you all keep address books with our address and phone number. You are very diligent about keeping track of name changes when someone new marries into the family, when new babies are born, or when folks have remarried. Some of you keep extensive lists of multiple marriages, names of various children and stepchildren, dates of weddings, divorces, etc. And yet, somehow my last name has never been included on these lists. For the family that I married into, I suppose this is just an oversight. For my relatives, I would think that you would still remember the name that I have had all of my life.
Let's just be honest here. You don't approve of a woman who does not take her husband's last name so you simply ignore her brashness. If you continue to call her "Mrs. Edward A." then maybe someday she'll get it through her thick skull that she should not only adopt his last name, but his first name too. Just a little adult peer pressure mixed in with the holiday cheer.
That is never, ever going to happen, so can we please stop this charade? I'm not asking you to agree with my choice, but it would be a nice Christmas gift if you would simply accept, and dare I say respect, my decision as an adult to choose my own name. It may be radical, inappropriate, or disrespectful in your eyes, but it is afterall my decision. I do not impose my beliefs on you. Can you imagine if I mailed all of my Christmas cards with your maiden names on the envelopes? Oi, the scandal! All I'm asking is that you pay me the same courtesy.
Love mixed with a little attitude,
DR. JANET P. STAMATEL (not Mrs. Janet A., nor Mrs. Edward A., nor even Mrs. S.)
It's probably a good thing that I mailed my Christmas cards out before receiving many this year or else I would have been tempted to misbehave.
You may recall that Eddie and I have been married for over 8 years now. You may also remember that I did not change my name when I got married. I realize that in your busy lives this is a trivial matter, but I would think that those of you who made a scene about it at my wedding rehearsal in front of the priest would still recollect that precious moment. For those of you not at the wedding, perhaps you may have noticed our separate names on all of the checks, birthday cards, Christmas cards, and other correspondence we've sent over the years.
Trust me, I understand how you are all busy with your own lives and this minor point may have slipped your attention. However, I also know that you all keep address books with our address and phone number. You are very diligent about keeping track of name changes when someone new marries into the family, when new babies are born, or when folks have remarried. Some of you keep extensive lists of multiple marriages, names of various children and stepchildren, dates of weddings, divorces, etc. And yet, somehow my last name has never been included on these lists. For the family that I married into, I suppose this is just an oversight. For my relatives, I would think that you would still remember the name that I have had all of my life.
Let's just be honest here. You don't approve of a woman who does not take her husband's last name so you simply ignore her brashness. If you continue to call her "Mrs. Edward A." then maybe someday she'll get it through her thick skull that she should not only adopt his last name, but his first name too. Just a little adult peer pressure mixed in with the holiday cheer.
That is never, ever going to happen, so can we please stop this charade? I'm not asking you to agree with my choice, but it would be a nice Christmas gift if you would simply accept, and dare I say respect, my decision as an adult to choose my own name. It may be radical, inappropriate, or disrespectful in your eyes, but it is afterall my decision. I do not impose my beliefs on you. Can you imagine if I mailed all of my Christmas cards with your maiden names on the envelopes? Oi, the scandal! All I'm asking is that you pay me the same courtesy.
Love mixed with a little attitude,
DR. JANET P. STAMATEL (not Mrs. Janet A., nor Mrs. Edward A., nor even Mrs. S.)
It's probably a good thing that I mailed my Christmas cards out before receiving many this year or else I would have been tempted to misbehave.
posted by Janet | 10:41 AM
1 Comments:
I like snark when it's well-done; this is well done.
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